Monday, March 9, 2009

Gravida....Para

Today I went to my first ob visit. I know, most people will think that I am crazy waiting so long to go but I had a really hard time making myself go back to the office again. My Dr has been completely understanding and agreed to order the ultrasound prior to my first visit.

So today as I was going over my history with a new nurse I noticed she wrote down that I am gravida 6 para 3.

You may not know what these numbers mean. Here is a quick overview. Gravida is the number of pregnancy's that you have had and Para is the number of babies you have delivered.

She is correct...I am gravida 6. My first pregnancy was a 10 week miscarriage, 3 normal pregnancy's, 1 trisomy 18 pregnancy, and now.

But I quickly told her that I should be para 4. She told me that I am para 3. I explained that I carried full term and delivered a little boy that lived for almost 3 hours. She said that she is going to put him in the "not living" section and keep me at para 3. I explained again that he was born alive and I should be para 4 (I even told her that I do this for a living and I know that I am para 4!). She looked at me for a minute and said we will "figure this out" as she left the room.

I wanted to scream and cry..."HE COUNTS!!!! DON"T TAKE THIS AWAY FROM ME. HE LIVED, HE IS MINE, HE COUNTS!!!!"

My Doctor quickly confirmed that I am para 4 which helped me calm down but I was hurt and frustrated that para 3 was written on my chart and I don't even know if it was changed.

16 comments:

The Finnestad Family said...

I love Dr. Schoppe (sp?)and YES, most certainly YES, you are Gravida 6, Para 4. If you need me to have a discussion with your nurse, I would be more than happy to. So glad that "tomorrow is Tuesday"....you made it!

aaron♥michelle said...

Oh Jen!! I can't even imagine! Glad the doctor was able to set it straight... You are in my thoughts and prayers...

Jennie Bender said...

Her view of life is sad, isn't it?

He does count and he abides in Heaven. A child is an eternal soul. He is having a good day today!=) I hope you do, too!

Melissa said...

You are in my prayers! Timothy certainly counts and his short life made a difference and will continue to! May God continue to keep you safe and the Mocha safe!

The Puyallup Earnhardts said...

She is STUPID! I haven't even got my degree yet and I know that!! You hang on to what you know in your heart. Don't let a piece of paper destroy your joy right now. (or a STUPID NURSE with no bedside manner). Love you and Mocha and Timothy.

The Finnestad Family said...

Ooohhhhh....Stephanie said the "ST" word......;)

Jennifer said...

I am so glad that she did! I had a really hard time being nice in THIS post.

Heather said...

He does count!!! I'm glad you fought for him to count. I don't know that I would have had the courage, or maybe the energy. Your little Timothy counts. I'm sorry she was blind to this fact.

laus said...

of course he counts!! some people are just so blind ... i'm sorry you had to go through that and i hope it was changed in the chart for you.

marie clare said...

That post made me cry. Whats wrong with people. That nurse is in the wrong business. So sorry you had to go through that.

mom said...

You need to ask to look at your chart next month. It is your right and you can make sure it is correct. If not have the nurse or Dr change it. Don't let them get away with this. Timothy was born and he counts and don't let any one tell you any different. If you like I will go with you to your next appt and make sure that it gets done.

mom said...

You need to ask to look at your chart next month. It is your right and you can make sure it is correct. If not have the nurse or Dr change it. Don't let them get away with this. Timothy was born and he counts and don't let any one tell you any different. If you like I will go with you to your next appt and make sure that it gets done. I am his grandmother and no one is going to get away with this.

Jennifer said...

Yep...That's the MOM I know!!! You go girl!!!

The Williams Five said...

How could she even consider you Para 3? That is not right. Timothy held on through the pregnancy and even after. He lived. I'm so glad you held your ground.

Anonymous said...

He counts, of course he counts. I'm glad you stood up for yourself and for Timothy. Not to be mean, but could I have 20 minutes with her.... alone....
I'm sorry you even had to deal with that. He made a difference in my life, I bet he touched alot of others we don't even know about.
Signed, Jennifer & Timothys Aunt Laura

Aunt Laura said...

wow. I just read all of the comments. I think she hit a nerve. I bet I could get a pretty big group to meet her in the parking lot for a "chat". Who's in?
Aunt Laura